The “talking stage” used to be an exciting part of dating—two people getting to know each other before committing. But in Nigeria today, it seems many young people are stuck in an endless loop of talking stages that never lead to actual relationships. Why is that?
The Rise of Relationship Skepticism Romantic relationships were once seen as a beautiful journey. People didn’t dwell too much on past heartbreaks—they simply moved on, hoping their next relationship would be “the one.” But times have changed. Love now comes with baggage, and many young Nigerians prefer to keep things casual rather than risk another round of emotional turmoil.
The Root Causes of Commitment Phobia Several factors contribute to this growing fear of commitment among Nigerian youths:
- Trust Issues on Steroids Betrayal, ghosting, and cheating are so common that many people have become wary. Instead of diving headfirst into relationships, they tread lightly, keeping things at surface level to avoid getting hurt.
- Unhealed Trauma from Past Relationships Heartbreak lingers. Instead of opening up again, people opt for indefinite talking stages with no labels—just vibes. It feels safer that way.
- Fear of Emotional Vulnerability In Nigerian culture, emotional openness, especially among men, is often seen as weakness. Society teaches people to suppress their feelings rather than express them, leading to emotionally detached relationships.
- Economic Struggles Affecting Romance With rising costs of living, many young Nigerians feel relationships are a luxury they can’t afford. The pressure to offer financial security before committing discourages many from taking relationships seriously.
- Social Media’s Unrealistic Standards Online, relationships appear as curated perfection—baecations, luxurious gifts, and matching pajamas. This portrayal scares many from fully committing, fearing they can’t provide the fantasy social media demands.
The Future of Dating The talking-stage syndrome is real, but will Nigerian youths move past this era of relationship uncertainty? While dating dynamics may continue evolving, one thing remains clear—love isn’t dead; people are just more cautious than ever.
